He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Buhtt sex?
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
