On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
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