Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
