Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
