I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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