It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
3 2 1 whiskey
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Randomize
