No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
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