Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Randomize
