my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Randomize