I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
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