Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize