That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
But break dance skills will only take you so far
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
