I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
