i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
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