thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Randomize
