why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
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