I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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