it hurts more in the daytime
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
I supernannyed him into submission
Randomize
