I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
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