We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
Randomize
