If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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