last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
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