whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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