I don't think brook has ever known best
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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