Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
