So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Randomize
