We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
