awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
