having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
