he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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