i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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