Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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