3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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