I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Randomize
