C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
We are all done wearing pants today
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Randomize
