i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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