if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
