i need an iv and a liver transplant
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
