Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Randomize
