I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
