love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
