I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
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