dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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