found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
