I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
