Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
They are going to name an STD after you.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
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