so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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