the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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