fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
