My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
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