It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
